Updated: Apr 16, 2019
I think this picture was taken during my senior year of high school. I still chew and pop my gum and show all of my teeth when I laugh. (LOL) I was living in Alconbury, England as an Air Force Brat when this picture was taken. I was at the same school from 7th grade until I graduated. Friend groups changed over the years. Some friendships were closer than others. Some people I spoke to because we were in the same biology class together. Many people were acquaintances just because we were on the same cheerleading team, cross country team or basketball team together. Some people were lunch buddies, some were there to talk to on the long bus ride home from school and then there was the ones you called best friend. Your best friend was the one you would stick up for in a fight. You best friend was the one who bought your lunch when you left your purse at home, the one you went shopping with, talked about boys with and caught up on the latest high school gossip wit. She was the one you did homework with in your bedroom while listening to a new cassette tape of New Edition, Al B. Sure or Ready for the World on your jam box.
The thing about best friends in high school was that, when I called you my best friend, I stood flat footed as loyal only to be dropped or betrayed for different reasons. God was looking out for me though, he sent Mona George. We become neighbors, we worked at the same fast food restaurant together, and she introduced me to Christ. She was loyal, honest, loving and fun. She was my inner circle. Fast forward to young adulthood. The same rules applied. There were the sisters that I knew because we sang in the choir at church together. There were sisters that I knew because we attended the same play group, homeschool group, served in the same ministry etc. I thought betrayal in friendships would be a thing of the past as an adult woman. Guess what yawl, betrayal came through even as an adult. However, there was always those one or two sisters that became my inner circle. Fast forward past being an older adult to middle aged living. Being a military wife meant that every 3-4 years we would pack up and leave one base and start life at another base. Do you know what that meant for me? New relationships. Can I tell you that acquaintances, betrayers and the loyal still showed up. I could have told my teenaged self that I would never ever show myself friendly, get close to anyone or develop unconditional love. I could have told my adult self to build a wall and never let anyone in. Let me not forgot my middle aged self because she too is familiar with acquaintances, betrayers and the loyal. What I learned is that there are different levels of friendship and that is okay. Some will give 30%, some will give 60% and then there is a remnant that will be there and show up when you need her 100%! But sis, let me tell you something, you better read the scriptures and know that Gehazi, Miriam, Peter and Judas will always show up. Stop trying to avoid it. Embrace them, let them come and do what they are assigned to do. What is that you ask? Make you better. They are there to help you produce a character that is like the character of Christ. They helped me learn Galatians 5:22-23. Oh, and baby girl, let us not act like we have not been like Gehazi, Miriam, Peter or Judas. Stop playing the victim, this coin has two sides. John 13:35 says, " Everyone will know you as My followers if you demonstrate your love to others." So, as a middle aged woman riding the train of peri-menopause, midlife transition, a semi empty nest, and boldness to say what I need to say...to you I say, just love em' boo. It will make the Lord very happy.